Get or Miss

Get or Miss

I am an angry girl,
and I do not know
if I have a right to be
or not. I don’t get
or miss your confusion,
your lack of decision,
because damn, you bailed
when you were in position.

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Turn On the Light

Turn On the Light
Sometimes my parents leave
in the evening for dinner,
and I’m too depressed
or tired to go with them.
They’ll leave around 7pm,
and in the spring or summer,
it’s still light out,
and they forget to turn
on the porch light
so they can see their way in
once they were home.
I turn on the light for them
while they are gone.
Sometimes when they’re away
I’m afraid of the magnitude
of stupid, dangerous thoughts,
what the voices is my head say
as they do when I’m alone.
Because when I’m alone
I forget I won’t be alone
forever, and that people
do care for me.
So I turn on the light.
I think of my mom,
my dad,
my brothers,
my grandma,
my cousin,
my aunts and uncles,
my friends,
and the way my life
would crumble away
in their hands.
I keep going,
heart beating,
breathing.
Because who will turn the light
on for them when I’m not there?
I turn on the light in me, because I care,
because I forget
that it’s not about me
and so much about them.

Nyctophilia

Nyctophilia

At night sleep evades
me, and I honestly
ceased caring.
The night is beautiful,
so easily reachable,
its inky, warm cloud
drawing you in closely
wrapping you up
like a shadowy blanket
with holes punched in it,
creating shimmering stars
just for you.
I can live longer,
love longer
write endlessly,
recreate myself,
because anything
is possible. I can make
as many mistakes
as I do, because tomorrow,
every tomorrow,
and every night
I have time,
all the time
in the world,
to make it all
up to you.